Sometimes I want to change my mind.

I am officially two weeks in to my first nursing class. And, let me tell ya-it's no walk in the park. To add to the difficulty of being a new student in an accelerated, online class, things have picked up at work. By picked up I mean that all of a sudden we've had a large influx of kids who need placements in good homes, homes with licensing complaints that just can't be simple to deal with, and four new homes in the process of being licensed. It seems that God has chosen to answer a lot of prayers all at once. He is amazing! But, I often wonder what I am to learn from all of this. I know that I'm learning a lot, but I would really love to know what the main lesson is for me.

When things get busy like this-working 50+ hours a week, studying approximately 30 hours a week, and feeling like life as I knew it no longer exists, I panic. What if this isn't what I want to do-WHAT IF I WANT TO CHANGE MY MIND??!! Then the exciting answer pops in the front of my mind. This won't always, necessarily be what I want to do at all. I'm going along with God's plan for my life and that has called for me to make some pretty big sacrifices-kind of like Noah. But, none the less, I ask myself at least once a day-"Do I really want to do this?" Especially when I realize that I do like my job, and I will miss my kids and families, and the comfortable box that I exist in. I guess it's ok to second guess myself and trust that the Big Guy upstairs. It's not always an easy balance to maintain, but in the end I suppose that will part of a lesson that He has for me.